I must have done something to please the gods recently. Remember last week when I posted about how I’d gotten a great new job and was moving to California? Peanuts compared to what just happened. You’re not going to believe this. I hardly believe it myself. If you’re standing, sit down, and if you’re sitting, stand up:
I just won the lottery.
Saturday morning, two days after arriving in California, I was in a 7-11 buying a Coke and some snacks to take back to the hotel and I saw a SuperLotto Plus sign advertising the $13 million jackpot. I thought to myself, “Boy, my luck sure has been great lately; how cool would it be if I actually won the lottery?”
So what the hell, I bought a ticket. I pulled some numbers out of my ass. It was 3:07 in the afternoon, so I started with 3-7. My birthday’s December 18th, so I added 18. The nutrition info on the Coke listed 33g of carbohydrates and 40mg of sodium: 33-40. Then, for the MegaBall number, I chose 2, since it was my second day in California and this was the second lottery ticket I’d bought in my entire life.
I just about shat my pants when they announced the winning numbers: 03-07-18-33-40…and the MegaBall? Yep: 02.
I didn’t start screaming or anything, because I had always told myself that if I ever won a million dollars I would be cool and collected. So I just sat there calmly and quietly and tried to count to a million in my head. I got to 102 before I realized how much money $13 million is.
$13 million! I’m a millionaire! A goddamn multi-millionaire! I mean, yeah, there’ll be taxes and whatnot, but still. Jesus. This just about makes up for the cost of living increase.
Of course, now all I can think about is how much work this is going to involve. I have to get the ticket verified, I have to get a financial adviser, I need to decide whether I want the lump sum or the payments, I have to fend off the hundreds of people who are going to start begging for handouts, and of course I’ve gotta do some research to make sure those numbers aren’t cursed so I don’t end up like Hurley on Lost. All while starting a new job (yes, I’m still going to go to work).
This has been one hell of a lucky month.