When I got home from work a few days ago, I found, waiting for me on my doorstep, a package containing the world’s geekiest garment. It’s warm, waterproof, windproof, breathable, and it has thirty freaking pockets. Thirty! Many of them hidden! It even has built in wiring corridors connecting every single pocket so I can carry an absolutely ungodly number of devices with wires running every which way, completely hidden from view within the protective shell of my jacket! Oh yeah, and it’s black! And has magnets!
Yes, I bought myself an eVest.
By some incredible happenstance of fate, on the very morning after I received this fine bundle of ultra-pockitude, the weather took a turn for the worse. The famed Oregon drizzles have started back up, it’s getting colder, and today there was even a thunderstorm. So I’ve gotten to wear my new jacket a lot. And oh dear sweet Lord do I love it. Let me tell you how much I love it: I love it soooooo much. That’s how much I love it. In a perfect world, geeks would be born in eVests instead of placentas. It’s that good.
I haven’t come anywhere near to filling up all the pockets yet. I’m not even sure I’ve found all the pockets yet. Already I’ve got so much gadgetry stowed away in this thing that it weighs a good ten pounds or so. My only regret is that I can’t get away with wearing it around inside heated buildings without looking stupid.
It even has a built-in beverage holder perfect for a 20oz. bottle of Coke. How cool is that?
Pretty damn cool.